Life In Prison

Goodbye Annie

This morning Karin and I walked our roommate Ann to the front gate to say goodbye.  Ann is a simple, sweet girl who Karin and I dubbed as little sister.  Although her life has been filled with trauma and pain she still has a very childlike nature.  Ann was my first roommate,  shortly after they bunked us together we were both moved into Karin’s room.  With Ann’s permission I’m going to share a little bit of her story.

Ann is the oldest of 4 children and was raised primarily in Arizona.  Her Mother is currently serving a State prison sentence and her Father shot himself on her 15th birthday in front of Ann and her best friend.  After her Father died, she was left to care for her younger brothers and sister because her Mother began dating abusive men and using drugs.  She didn’t have much of a support group and she also began using drugs.  She has 3 beautiful children that her brother is currently in the process of adopting but she’s never been married.

Ann left today with no material possessions.  She will catch a Greyhound bus to Texas where she will live with a woman she hardly knows.  Many of the women incarcerated have stories not so different than Anne’s.  Their lives have been filled with trauma and pain and they have no support from family.  One thing I have witnessed in Ann’s case is the love that our Father in Heaven has for her.  For she truly is a child of God and will be an incredible force for good if she stays sober and turns to her Father in Heaven.

I was grateful that Ann and Karin agreed to let me say a prayer before she left.  While I prayed for her safely and asked our Father in Heaven to give her peace, I became emotional and realized how loved she truly is.  Ann, if you read this someday I want you to know that my life is good because I have the gospel of Jesus Christ.  That I felt a glimpse of the love your Father in Heaven has for you today and he wants to bless you with all the good things life has to offer.  Take it a day at a time and reach out to your aunt in Colorado.  Ironically Ann’s Aunt is also LDS and Ann recently got in touch with her.  Thank you my friend for blessing my life with your goodness.  You will be sorely missed but not forgotten

I also found a letter this morning that really cheered me up, I decided to share it and hopefully end on a positive note:)

Mom, I really, really, really, really, REALLY miss you! Believe me it isn’t easy going to the Nike outlet and not getting a thing.  Probably harder than being on the “insisde” Plus Dad favors my sisters one million to one. It’s ridiculous! I never realized how much he did until you left which is why I really miss you. On Saturday we went to this really fun pool called Cottonwood Heights and it was just like Lava Hot springs with the platforms and everything. It’s in Murray and I’m so excited to go with you.  I think you would have a blast maybe if Dad didn’t come (I think he literally hates me more than the world itself) I know it’s hard to believe but it’s totally true.  I’m really looking forward to that footlocker trip you promised me, I also have the Lone Peak basketball camp so I can show off my skills (and shoes).  I really miss you, I know I can’t stop saying it but it’s true.  I really want you home and Sadie deserves a whole year in her room.  Like, I can’t even take it anymore!  I feel like Dad thinks I’m a rodent and he just doesn’t care what I do. Sadie is more mischievous than ever!  But I got all A’s and B’s this year! Not that Dad cared because I’m a “Rodent”.  I feel like I’m on the “inside” like every day so I feel your pain.  If Dad read this he would say I deserve it all wich is not true.  So meanwhile I’ve been sleeping over with a lot of friends which is good because I’m not afraid of sleepovers.  Well, Love you Mom. I wish I could give you a big hug but I guess not

That boy made me laugh so hard this morning! What a little hero he is.  I want to thank you for reading and commenting on my blog.  To the LDS, 12 steppers you guys are my family and have truly carried me for years, I love you all more than words can say.  I am so grateful for the support from so many good people. Childhood friends(Good old Sevier County:) Highland/ Alpine friends and some new friends that I’ve never even met that have taken the time to reach out.  You are such a force of good in my life, thank you!!

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